Trump’s never had a real job, but most of us have. And, all of us would be canned, shunned and jailed if we did Trumpy things at work. — Trump’s never had a real job, but most of us have. And, all of us would be canned, shunned and jailed if we did Trumpy things at work. Take the Capitol riot, for instance. If I laid the groundwork and incited that shit I’d be sharing a cell today with…

Where I ended up after high school when I realized the only thing, I could do well was throw a football — I grew up in a small city in Wisconsin and attended small, parochial grade school and high school. When I was in high school from ‘98-’01, if a student didn’t show interest in becoming a pastor or teacher, the staff didn’t really know what to do. I don’t recall getting…

So I wrote the musical timeline of my life (from 1982–2001). — My friend, Rachel, recently told me she was on a podcast to talk about the six–10 songs that would define, or narrate (or whatever) her life. …

The house wasn’t big, but it was built on a hill that looked down into a valley, bluffs on either side. In every direction was treeless… — The house wasn’t big, but it was built on a hill that looked down into a valley, bluffs on either side. In every direction was treeless, rolling hills — farm country in the southernmost part of Minnesota. Corn would be planted in the coming weeks. The side of the house…

My great-grandparents were resourceful. Most people who survived the Great Depression were, or so I’ve been told. — Not a nail, scrap of material, or cherry tomato went to waste in their home. They had a garden in the backyard that yielded a good amount of their food each year and a cellar in the basement to house all sorts of pickled foodstuff that went from the garden…

A man wakes up in the morning and notices his mouth feels like sandpaper and smells like old milk. — A man wakes up in the morning and notices his mouth feels like sandpaper and smells like old milk. Nobody else is around. It was another Thursday in Eau Claire, Wisconsin. He thought, I need a humidifier. After a minute, he rolls off his white-ish sheets and towards his bathroom…

The time I got owned by a song that I hate. — I had a late coffee this morning at a work meeting and by the time lunch rolled around it sounded like my tummy was driving on the side of a highway. It was rumblin’. I was hungry. Like the wolf. While healthier options exist, I felt drawn to the Nashville…

Math used to be the thing I hated most in this world. — My friend, Pete, turned 30-something last week and to celebrate he requested a cross-country skiing party. He’s usually more fun. I’ve never been skiing. I like to stay securely footed on snow and ice. I’m 6'4" and it’s a long way to fall. From the first…

The following story does not promote or condone eating nachos. — In 2019 there was a family reunion. My mom, dad and I drove from Verona, Wisconsin to Big Sky, Montana to spend a week reintroducing ourselves to my dad’s family; most of whom we see every other presidential election cycle or when somebody dies. It was the most time I’d…